Hope

Jeff Green | Oct 04, 2012

Back to HomeFeature Article - October 4, 2012

HOPE -  Group offers support, advice for parents dealing with acting-out youthby Laura Moloughney

Helping Other Parents Everywhere (HOPE) is a non-profit organization that offers support to parents dealing with acting-out youth.

Laura Moloughney helped bring HOPE to Belleville in the spring of 2011. After dealing with feelings of isolation and shame surrounding her daughter's troubled behaviour, Laura sought help, and found hope.

"We wanted something local that worked with the community so parents could have a whole support network," said Laura. "There's a lot of support for kids but not a lot for parents. Parents of acting out youth have a lot of guilt and shame and fear, and we know because we felt that way."

Mr. McMillan, president of HOPE, says his teenage daughter's issues, including trouble with the law, were causing constant friction at home. He credits HOPE with teaching him to disengage from the battle.

"You have to invest some time and energy in yourself as well," he continued. "If all your time and energy goes toward dealing with your child, eventually you just drown in it."

Laura also found that stepping back and getting a new perspective helped ease tensions between her and her daughter.

"The greatest gift I gave my daughter was responsibility for her life," she said.

"Sometimes it's difficult to watch them fall down or fail but by letting them make their own choices it makes them who they are."

These parents now enjoy close relationships with their daughters, which they credit to the support they received at HOPE.

"It's a safe, non-blaming atmosphere," Mr. McMillan said.

"We don't judge people and we don't tell them what to do, we support them and we offer advice based on our experiences. It's not a pity party; it's about giving people tools to set boundaries and a safe haven for them to talk about their concerns."

The organization is open to any parent who has concerns about their child.

"We have parents who come because their children's rooms are so messy it's driving them crazy, and others whose child has been arrested for drug trafficking," Laura explains. "This is for the parents, so it's about anything that's disturbing to them."

HOPE has weekly meetings you can attend and join. Anyone who is interested in bringing HOPE to this area, please call the info line 1-866-492-1299. For more information visit www.helpingotherparentseverywhere.com.